Im at strip club and am horny
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
In other news, I just burned my penis
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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