my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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