i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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