Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
