i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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