She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
