so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
My ass is underappreciated
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
