Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
