I'm really into asian looking animals
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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