how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
