just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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