her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
