ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
