Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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