is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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