Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
