I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Farmville is her only friend.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
