no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
