He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
