im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
it's great music for shaving your balls
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
