Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize