This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
