HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
