and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
