I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
