dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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