I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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