I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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