Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
