Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I love you.
Bad choice
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
