remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
