using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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