problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize