I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
