Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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