Already got asked if we're dating
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
