Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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