My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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