i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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