so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i just made my gag reflex go away.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize