Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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