Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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