i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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