Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
