She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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