the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
