so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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