Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
