Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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