He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
